A Vulnerable Share + How I’m Moving Thru My Feels
Hi friends,
This share comes straight from my tender, open heart today. I’ve been feeling extra exhausted and emotional this past week. I know you as a sensitive soul may be feeling this way too. So I want to share something I moved through just a few short hours ago…
You could say the energy I’m feeling (and perhaps you’re feeling) is because of the full moon lunar eclipse this past weekend. And to be sure, my family and I do get very energetically affected by eclipses and full moons - cue 4 of the 5 of us waking up restless and activated late Saturday night! But to give all my power away to the eclipse would be a huge mistake. I’m a big proponent of understanding the cosmic energies at play, but not letting them sweep you up and choose for you... For me, yes I believe the eclipse energy is a piece of it - perhaps an amplifier. But my intuition is telling me today that I tend to get into a “slump” after a big phase of creation. When I’m creating I’m channeling so much high vibrational energy through me.. and then I have to come down, and it’s not always pretty or graceful.
August was a really powerful month of creating for me in between client sessions. I recorded 20 new meditations, a masterclass on “Every Day Energy Care for the Family,” and two new podcast episodes… So now September is time to edit. I woke up feeling sluggish, so I took a nature walk after school drop off which always lifts my spirits. I told myself surely I’d be ready to tackle the editing when I returned home. Yet when I walked in the door, I found myself dragging my feet. I allowed myself to get distracted by things that didn’t need my attention. I made up excuses as to why I wasn’t sitting down to edit. My energy dipped again. My motivation waned.
Then my inner critic showed up. And she can be vicious…
“Why can’t I just get going on this? People need this content, so just get it done Lyndsey. I blocked off my morning specifically for this. What is wrong with me?? Why do other people have so much energy and mine is so inconsistent? I should be doing so much more. I’m tired. Wait am I actually just being lazy and unfocused? I’d be so embarassed for people to see how unproductive I’ve been lately…”
And then I caught myself. I became aware that I was starting to spiral. I took a deep breath and did what I do best. I sat with my feelings and let them move through me. Then I imagined I was one of my clients and started coaching myself.
What would I tell my client right now?
Well, first I would validate everything she’s feeling. Then I would ask her to let out anything else that’s just below the surface out - all the fears, frustrations, and not so nice things that you’ve been thinking/feeling about yourself. Say them out loud. Write them out. Acknowledge them and let them know that you see them. Then release them.
Next I would ask her what is really true here and what’s just a story she’s created in her mind?… (Spoiler alert: For me it often comes back to stories about self worth, perfectionism, and not being “enough.”)
I would remind her to give herself grace and pick herself back up again. That it’s ok to have off days, off weeks, or even off months. That this is not who she is, it’s simply how she’s feeling right now. That she doesn’t have to assign some huge meaning to it. That rest days are equally productive. And that this is all part of being human.
Then I would ask her to rewrite these stories she’s made up in her head today. To dig a little deeper and ask herself where they’re actually coming from. What would she say to herself and how would she view herself if she was looking through the lens of unconditional love and compassion? I would have her look at her To Do list today and instead of checking off 5 things, just pick 1 or 2 to complete for now. And then after that, spend the entire post school afternoon outdoors with the kids as they inevitably remind you what matters most in life with their pure presence. (Which if you ask me what matters most in my life, in my humble opinion it’s simply “love.” Embodying love, giving + receiving love, and showing up in love.)
As I sit here writing this very vulnerable post, I feel myself moving out the last little remnants of self criticism that needed to go. Thank you for witnessing me today, friend. My hope is that something I said here will help you going forward too. And if you need a little extra love, envision me sending you virtual hugs right now!
From My Light To Yours,
Xo Lyndsey